Life so far…

The last time I blogged, I had just started my t.v fast. I had a couple of setbacks (hey, it’s my first fast!!) but all in all it went pretty well. I wasn’t perfect all of the time and cheated a few days, but I really feel like God honored my decision. One of the side-effects of the anti-Lyme drugs I have is ear-ringing. There would be some days I’d come home from work and really dread the silence; it just amplifies the ringing and can be very stressful at times. During those days, when I’d sit down to have my quiet time or just read…the ringing just about went away. It was so awesome how he honored my desire to have some time and peace with him. I did feel like I deepened my relationship with Him and even though I didn’t have a breakthrough in an area I was praying about I found that if I listened, He gave me insight on why I choose certain people and put myself in certain situations. Maturity is the goal and the situations I repeatedly find myself in make sense now. I need to learn how to handle these people/circumstances as a mature believer. One who’s graduated from milk and baby food and is eating meat. So, that means I have to stop taking things so personally. Yeah, it may be weird and hurtful when one of your friends ignores you when she thinks you don’ see her. But, what I need to start doing is stop wondering what I did to offend them (nothing) and why is it that they don’t want to talk to me (who cares) and start considering the source and start thinking about that person as an acquaintance (obviously) and stop wasting energy on pursuing this relationship. By no means am I suggesting that I can be rude or disrespectful. No. I don’t get permission to do that. I’m just saying that I have to put this relationship in perspective and leave it there. Wishing them the best, but knowing that’s probably a person that is better off in my life in a superficial way and being ok with that. That’s maturity and it isn’t always fun to get there is it? Hopefully, in a few months, I’ll be able to look back at this blog and recognize that this was the start of that process and be glad for the journey. It’s about time for me! I want to do awesome things for God and know this will be one great obstacle out of the way….finally.